The New York Dream

I have lots of dreams, and by dreams I mean life ambitions and goals. Most of them are pretty vague, which makes realizing them kind of complicated in a way I can't quite put my finger on. I have, for example, dreamed of going to New York City in this foggy unclear way since I was a tween girl reading Sassy magazine. Probably before that. Don't Judy Blume books take place in New York?

New York City is a little over 600 miles from Detroit, yet somehow it felt like I would never get there. I have been to places much further, but New York seemed somehow unattainable. Maybe because all of my dreams seemed similarly unattainable, because they are vague ideas. Yet I've continued to daydream and keep my aspirations in a safe little pocket in the back of my mind.

What I'm learning, and it's really not all that easy for a bunch of reasons, is to remain positive and hopeful, and to grab onto opportunity while I can. I wish I would have started learning this life lesson a really long time ago, but I am grateful to be learning it at all. A lot of people, a whole lot of people, never do get around to it.

Back in June, a couple old friends from high school, whom I hadn't seen in many years, happened to be in Detroit the same weekend - one from Texas, one from New York. Somehow the stars aligned for us to get together one night, along with my friend Shelly, who, like me, still lives in Michigan. We started talking about visiting Texas and how fun it would be. And then we made tentative plans to get together again a couple days later, before the two of them headed home, in opposite directions. Turns out I couldn't make the second get together, and I half jokingly texted my New York friend, saying I would just have to come and see him in New York instead. He replied, telling me that Shelly was going to be visiting NYC soon. I texted Shelly and asked her when she was going. She told me the dates and said, "You should come too."

Immediate response: dismissal. I couldn't possibly go to New York. Right? I have four kids, and money is tight (isn't it always?). And I had that whole personal crisis I talked about in this post. But here it was, this dream of mine, suddenly a whole lot less vague. Now I had a friend to go with me, a place to stay for free, an actual date. Here's something to know about your dreams. Hang on to them, and when the time is right, take a step toward making them real. One step turns into another, and that leads into another. Talk about them. Say it out loud, "I could do this." Admit to others that you're thinking about it. Ask for help. I talked to my mom and my mother-in-law to see if they could help with the kids, since Chris would be working while I was gone. Lo and behold, they said yes. One step closer. I thought some more and realized that, obviously, traveling alone costs considerably less than traveling with four kids. And that there is quite a bit to do in NYC that doesn't require spending much money. That vague, very old dream of mine was no longer blurry. It was coming into focus. Shelly started telling me about her friend's apartment, where we'd be staying, and things she thought I would like to do in New York. I started figuring out just how much this venture would cost. Things were getting specific. My dream was becoming a reality.

The universe wants to help us realize our dreams. That might sound new age-y and hokey, but I believe it. It's not magic. We have to do the work. We have to take the first step, the leap of faith. We have to keep moving, and looking for signs. We have to accept help that can make our dreams come true, and to recognize and seize opportunities. We have to believe.

I am not one to study the Bible, but this verse from Matthew 7:7 illustrates my point perfectly:

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

This is how the world works.

Often, I am so wrapped up in the mundane day to day stuff that I don't have the energy to focus on anything else. But when I do, it is more than worthwhile. How surreal it is to look back at last weekend and let it soak in that it really happened. I really did do all those things and see all those things. I read the signs and acted on the opportunities I was given, and I took a leap. Maybe it wasn't the best time to spend the money (when is it ever a good time?), but I know I will never regret that trip. I got to be just me, hanging out with my friends and sight seeing and shopping. I got to refresh. I got to do something I've always wanted to do. I know millions of people visit New York every year, and that it's not necessarily a remarkable thing. But for me, it was.

It's a Blog World

When I first started blogging, it was simply a writing outlet for me. I was always interested in writing, yet afraid to do much about it. Blogging was an easy way to dip my toes in without going for a swim, if you know what I mean. I never, ever thought that it would lead to meeting people, making extra cash, trying products at no cost, or going to events for free. In the coming weeks, I'd like to take a long hard look at which direction I'm planning to steer this blogging gig in the future. Perhaps I can even make time for writing outside the realm of the blogosphere from time to time. I do believe that having clearly defined goals is imperative if I have any hope of making my dreams a reality (figuring out just what those dreams are is an important first step!), so this is something I need to dedicate some time and thought to. My  head has sort of been in the clouds lately (okay, okay...for the past few months!) and I'd like to take a few deep breaths and focus.

Right now, though, I'm grateful. I'm grateful for the opportunity blogging has afforded me to have a writing medium that feels safe. I'm grateful for the little bits of extra money I make here and there which help with things like Christmas shopping and Detroit Edison* bills. I'm grateful for the people I've met, both virtually and in real life. I'm grateful for the opportunity to try new things. I'm grateful that sometimes I get to share those things with you all, in the form of giveaways. These days, blogging and social media are integral to advertising, communication, and information exchange, and I'm glad to be getting in on some of the fun and action!

Here are some of the coolest things I've experienced as a direct result of blogging, in no particular order:

• Meeting and interviewing Jeff Kinney. This was so cool, and something that would have never happened in Alysia's non-blogging world. Giving my kids the chance to meet one of their favorite authors and ride in his tour bus was totally phenomenal, and I hope it's an experience that they will always remember.
• Behind the scenes look at the Michigan dairy industry. So far I've had the opportunity to attend two special blogger events that involved touring Michigan dairy farms and finding out more about how milk gets from the cow to your table. I've toured Goma Dairy Farm in Marlette, and Horning Dairy Farm in Manchester, as well as the Michigan Dairy milk processing plant in Livonia. Talking with real farmers (and plant workers) and seeing how hard they work really gave me a new perspective and appreciation for the dairy products my family takes for granted.
• Lego KidsFest. Since Connor is a huge fan of anything to do with Legos, he was really excited to attend the Lego KidsFest in Novi last fall. Because he already wanted to go to this event, it was particularly awesome that I was unexpectedly given the chance to attend** for free, as a blogger. In exchange, I snapped some photos and wrote a blog post. Not bad at all.
• Gardner White Blog for a Grand. I entered a blogger contest that a local furniture chain was hosting, and  won the grand prize of a $1000 gift certificate for the store! This was really exciting because it meant that Chris and I got to use the gift certificate to purchase our first (non-hand-me-down) mattress!
• Sesame Street Live, Disney On Ice, and Monster Jam. These are three shows that I will have the pleasure of attending with my children during the next month, in exchange for a little blogging and social media promotion. If you're interested in winning tickets to Disney On Ice at the Palace of Auburn Hills, click HERE. If you're interested in winning tickets to Monster Jam at Detroit's Ford Field, click HERE. (Sorry, but the two Sesame Street Live giveaways that I hosted have ended).
• Castaway Bay. Our family was invited to a blogger event at Castaway Bay resort and indoor water park in Sandusky, Ohio.Since we were already in the neighborhood, we were also invited to a blogger event at a nearby family fun center, Ghostly Manor. We made a whole weekend out of it, and had a wonderful time. I'll be sharing more about our weekend by means of a couple blog posts and a super fun related announcement...very soon. Be patient!

As you can see, blogging has been good to me. And this list doesn't even get into the cool products I've been able to try, such as JAWS cleaning supplies and Conscious Box, just to name a couple. Everything I listed happened within the past 6-8 months or so. I'm excited to see what new opportunities 2013 will bring!

If you are a blogger, I'd love to know what cool opportunities you've been given as a result of blogging!



*Detroit Edison = electricity
**Connor & Mattie tagged along to the Lego KidsFest, as well as a few friends.

Screen Time Intervention

I'm going to admit something kind of dreadful. My kids have all fallen into the habit of going to sleep with the television on. Every night. It started when Lucy didn't sleep through the night until she was 18 months old. Desperate times, people. So when Mathilda began sharing a room with Lucy, she was also subjected to the nighttime movie, which quickly became a sleep necessity for her too. Bethany and Connor never (okay...rarely) went to sleep with the TV on until sometime in the last year or so. I'm not even sure how it happened. But somehow it started, and before we knew it, they couldn't manage without the television lulling them to sleep either. Parenting fail.

I like to make little goals for the kids over the summer months, and this year one of them is to break the bedtime TV habit. This is a huge, tall order. Like, you have no idea. Or maybe you do, and I'm not the only one with this particular parenting fail? Anyway, I thought our recent vacation in Lexington would be the perfect time to get moving on kicking the habit, since there were no televisions in the bedrooms. And...it went well. Just perfectly fine. I read to the kids longer than usual, which helped things along. There was a little trouble falling asleep at times, but no tears (definitely  helps when there are simply no TVs in the bedrooms to facilitate the habit), and I'd call it a successful venture.

Then we got home and the kids automatically assumed they were back on full television bedtime viewing mode. Nope. I put my foot down, and I held it down firmly. It's been less than a week, but so far we're doing pretty well. Tears have been shed, but the tragedy of the matter seems to be wearing off somewhat. I told Lucy that if she really wants to use her TV pacifier at bedtime, she can go to bed an hour early and watch a DVD before I come up to read. Hasn't happened yet. They're getting over it. I have confidence that this goal will be reached.

I think I've mentioned that a friend remarked on Facebook that she doesn't allow her kids to watch television during the day in the summer. I thought this was a wonderful idea and decided to adopt it as well. Our magic hour is 6:00. Until that time, no one uses the TV or the computer. Unfortunately, I started noticing a little clock watching going on.

"Mom...mom...mom...how many hours until six o'clock, mom? Can I pick a show first, mom? Is it almost six o'clock, mom?"

So I had to add a provision to this new rule of ours. If any one of them badgers us about how long 'til six o'clock, that will mean that no one will get to use the TV or computer that day. One person will ruin it for everyone.

When we were in Lexington, the little girls wanted to watch a DVD on the second night. So I popped in  Barbie and the Magic of the Pegasus, and mid-way through it, the DVD player suddenly stopped working. There was a little bit of grumbling, but after that night, the television did not get turned on again all week. No one even asked for it once. There was even cable! So I know they are capable of refraining. Not having the TV on at all was really refreshing. We also had no WiFi, and my cell phone had no signal either! There's nothing like unplugging for a few days. Instead of television and internet, the kids read, wrote in journals, drew, played outside, worked in their Summer Bridge books (they were super excited that I made them bring these on vacation! Note: I'm being sarcastic.), and practically collapsed from exhaustion at the end of each busy day.

What my little sweeties don't yet know is that I'm pretty sure this rule is going to stay in place once school starts.

Do you have specific rules for television and computer usage for your kids?

Would you look at that, they're not in a TV trance!

Cool tree in the backyard at the cottage...not a computer screen in sight!

Monday Morning Madness

I've grown accustomed to loving Monday mornings because of book club. But this week we had to re-arrange things and we'll be meeting Thursday instead. So instead of enjoying myself at Aimee's house, I'll be cleaning up the Mother's Day mess and doing laundry. Since my family seems to enjoy eating, I guess I should fit in a trip to the grocery store too. None of this sounds very appealing. At all. But it is a beautiful day, so I'm going to try to get my junk done quickly so Mattie and I can get outside and enjoy the sunshine.

Looking at my calendar for the week is making my head spin. It's all good though. Or nothing too bad, at least. I am particularly looking forward to Lucy's field trip, book club, meeting a friend for a walk, and having the book club girls over for a movie night. My goal for the week is basically to make it to the weekend intact. I think I can do it.

Besides my nutty schedule, I'd like to focus on a few things this week.

1. Pay attention to what I'm eating and feeding my family. Cooking needs to become a verb that happens on a more regular basis in my kitchen. Somehow, some way, it will become habit. It must!
2. Keep up with the exercising. I feel like I've been doing okay with this. I need to keep doing okay and up the ante a little bit. The season of bare legs and swimsuits is approaching quickly. I don't want to spend my summer mortified. Must stay motivated.
3. Laundry is getting out of hand again. I need to get it back to a more manageable mountain. One of the biggest problems is putting away the clean clothes. As in I hate putting away the clean clothes. Chris takes care of his own, and I've got Bethany and Connor more or less trained. So that leaves me, Lucy, and Mattie. And we have a lot of clothes, with not enough closet and dresser space. I'm going to try to make time to wrangle this mess into something I can handle. Wish me luck!

Anyone have any tips to help keep me sane? Meal planning tips? Exercising motivation? Laundry hope?

Do you have any particular goals for the week? Or anything special planned?