Monday, October 25, 2010: While I am preparing dinner in the kitchen, Mattie is peacefully entertaining herself in the family room. Um, scratch that. Upon closer observation, it is revealed that La Petite Destruct-o has actually removed about half the wipes from the brand new package, and they are now strewn about the family room. Put the kids to work cleaning every surface imaginable with said wipes, because so help me they will not be wasted! Kids had fun, lemonade out of lemons - check.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010: After wipes fiasco yesterday, I decide that little miss just needs to be included more in what the rest of us are doing. On the agenda for today - making Halloween decorations with Lucy. Mattie is in the high chair, at the table with us, and armed with farm animal markers specifically designed for toddlers. This is going to be fun! Engrossed in a project, I am called to attention by Lucy's scream of horror as she notes that Mattie has cute chunky marker in her mouth. More accurately, she is sucking marker juice out of Patty Cake Purple. Face, lips, and tongue are purple. Markers are washable, and pretty sure they're not poisonous; all is well in the world. Crayons fair no better, and little bits get stuck in teeth.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Possibilites
Picture a supermarket, let's call it Food Mart. As you look around, you are disappointed because there isn't much to choose from, and what you see doesn't look great. You are utterly underwhelmed. However, you're hungry, your family likes to eat, and your cupboards are getting pretty bare. You really need to shop, and this is the only place in town.
You head over to the produce department. There is a man standing behind a counter, the liaison between you and the fruits and veggies. He is there to help you, but first he requires your driver's license. For some reason, handing your identification to this man feels kind of shameful, as if he is a police officer pulling you over for a traffic violation. Although it doesn't feel quite right, you hand over the I.D. without question, automatically resigned that there is no other way. You start telling this man what you want. When you ask for bananas, he hands you a basket with three bananas in it. They're spotted and bruised; definitely not what you'd choose for yourself. And you have four kids for goodness sake - three bananas is not enough! Yet you say nothing; you simply accept the basket, which is really cute, and put it in your cart. The same thing happens with everything you want; the man consistently hands over poor quality produce, and he never gives you as much as you'd like. Somehow, the cute baskets make you feel a little better, which makes no sense! Who cares about the outer packaging when what's inside a)isn't enough, and b)is not quality? When you're done shopping in the produce department, you wait for the man to return your driver's license, but he doesn't. Though it feels strangely illicit, you reach back and retrieve it yourself.
By the time you get to the check-out, your basket is sort of full, but there really isn't enough and it's not really what you want. As you unload your cart, you feel dissatisfied, but you continue with the transaction. You're hungry and your family likes to eat, after all.
The lack of selection in the Food Mart is a metaphor for your perceived lack of options in your life. The man is an authority figure, your self-conscious, deciding for you what you deserve and what you are permitted to have. You hand yourself to him willingly when you give him your I.D. This is you telling him has permission to run your show. The cute little baskets represent your outer self and your physical surroundings. They don't look half bad, so perhaps it's best not to upset the status-quo, not to argue with the subconscious man. But you do manage to bravely reclaim yourself when you snatch your driver's license back from him - there is hope! Yet you continue with the transaction, thereby accepting your slim pickings and taking what you can get.
Now imagine instead that you are walking into a huge, gleaming clean supermarket, let's call it Super Food Emporium. There before you is aisle after aisle of every food you can imagine, and many you've never heard of. Everything looks so good, so fresh, so delectable! You start filling your cart, but there are so many lovely things you want, everything barely fits. In fact, you have to get a second cart. Everywhere you turn there are friendly, smiling store clerks standing by to help you, and encouraging you to try everything that looks good to you. You are filled with happiness and gratitude because shopping here is such fun!
If you had a choice between shopping at Food Mart or shopping at the Super Food Emporium, the best decision would be obvious, a total no-brainer. You do have a choice. Choose the better store, and bask in the endless array of options and opportunities available to you. Choose well, and accept guidance from positive influences along the way. This is your life. The only thing stopping you from having, doing, learning, and experiencing anything you can imagine is you. Step out of your own way.
You head over to the produce department. There is a man standing behind a counter, the liaison between you and the fruits and veggies. He is there to help you, but first he requires your driver's license. For some reason, handing your identification to this man feels kind of shameful, as if he is a police officer pulling you over for a traffic violation. Although it doesn't feel quite right, you hand over the I.D. without question, automatically resigned that there is no other way. You start telling this man what you want. When you ask for bananas, he hands you a basket with three bananas in it. They're spotted and bruised; definitely not what you'd choose for yourself. And you have four kids for goodness sake - three bananas is not enough! Yet you say nothing; you simply accept the basket, which is really cute, and put it in your cart. The same thing happens with everything you want; the man consistently hands over poor quality produce, and he never gives you as much as you'd like. Somehow, the cute baskets make you feel a little better, which makes no sense! Who cares about the outer packaging when what's inside a)isn't enough, and b)is not quality? When you're done shopping in the produce department, you wait for the man to return your driver's license, but he doesn't. Though it feels strangely illicit, you reach back and retrieve it yourself.
By the time you get to the check-out, your basket is sort of full, but there really isn't enough and it's not really what you want. As you unload your cart, you feel dissatisfied, but you continue with the transaction. You're hungry and your family likes to eat, after all.
The lack of selection in the Food Mart is a metaphor for your perceived lack of options in your life. The man is an authority figure, your self-conscious, deciding for you what you deserve and what you are permitted to have. You hand yourself to him willingly when you give him your I.D. This is you telling him has permission to run your show. The cute little baskets represent your outer self and your physical surroundings. They don't look half bad, so perhaps it's best not to upset the status-quo, not to argue with the subconscious man. But you do manage to bravely reclaim yourself when you snatch your driver's license back from him - there is hope! Yet you continue with the transaction, thereby accepting your slim pickings and taking what you can get.
Now imagine instead that you are walking into a huge, gleaming clean supermarket, let's call it Super Food Emporium. There before you is aisle after aisle of every food you can imagine, and many you've never heard of. Everything looks so good, so fresh, so delectable! You start filling your cart, but there are so many lovely things you want, everything barely fits. In fact, you have to get a second cart. Everywhere you turn there are friendly, smiling store clerks standing by to help you, and encouraging you to try everything that looks good to you. You are filled with happiness and gratitude because shopping here is such fun!
If you had a choice between shopping at Food Mart or shopping at the Super Food Emporium, the best decision would be obvious, a total no-brainer. You do have a choice. Choose the better store, and bask in the endless array of options and opportunities available to you. Choose well, and accept guidance from positive influences along the way. This is your life. The only thing stopping you from having, doing, learning, and experiencing anything you can imagine is you. Step out of your own way.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Summer, Summer
It's my favorite time of year. The kids are out of school and the weather is warm; what could be better? Since our year of no organized activities starts now, I'm even happier. Nonetheless, we have already been quite busy.We're into the second week of vacation, and so far we have been occupied with two dance recitals, various play dates (Chris hates that term), sleepovers, and trips to parks, plus a few days up north.
Our trip up north was pretty low key and lots of fun. The kids and I went to Rogers City with Linda, and stayed at Linda's sister Donna's house. We spent plenty of time just hanging out, and did some fun local tourist-y stuff. The kids have a great time doing really simple things, like playing with Donna's dogs and going to the thrift shop in town. Even the tourist stuff felt easy and laid back, and bonus - everything we did was free. We climbed a lighthouse, saw the remains of a shipwreck on the beach, went to a little museum in town, went to nearby Ocqueoc Falls, and hung out at the beach. The best thing may have been visiting Donna's son Joe's farm, where he let each of the kids take a turn driving his tractor. Even though it sounds like a lot, it really was pleasant and slow-paced.
There are so many things I want to do with the kids, yet I don't want to overwhelm us and spend the summer rushing around . With four kids that might be inevitable, though I am fighting it. I'm kind of torn, like usual. I want a serene summer, yet I want to do a million things. So I'm just trying to slow down and not over-schedule. Part of the reason we decided to put a halt to activities is so the kids can enjoy being at home more often, and summertime is a perfect time to start. One problem is that as Bethany and Connor get older, they want to spend a lot of time with their friends. I remember what that was like, so I try to accommodate them as best I can without making life too crazy.
As much as I yearn to see everything, everywhere, all the time, Michigan is truly a lovely state with so much to offer. I loved exploring in the Roger's City area, which I can hardly believe we've never done before. We've only ever been there for a wedding and in the winter for Christmas parties. Soon we'll be going on another Michigan up north vacation, this time with my mom. I'm looking forward to seeing some more of my home state, as un-exotic as that may be.
Our trip up north was pretty low key and lots of fun. The kids and I went to Rogers City with Linda, and stayed at Linda's sister Donna's house. We spent plenty of time just hanging out, and did some fun local tourist-y stuff. The kids have a great time doing really simple things, like playing with Donna's dogs and going to the thrift shop in town. Even the tourist stuff felt easy and laid back, and bonus - everything we did was free. We climbed a lighthouse, saw the remains of a shipwreck on the beach, went to a little museum in town, went to nearby Ocqueoc Falls, and hung out at the beach. The best thing may have been visiting Donna's son Joe's farm, where he let each of the kids take a turn driving his tractor. Even though it sounds like a lot, it really was pleasant and slow-paced.
There are so many things I want to do with the kids, yet I don't want to overwhelm us and spend the summer rushing around . With four kids that might be inevitable, though I am fighting it. I'm kind of torn, like usual. I want a serene summer, yet I want to do a million things. So I'm just trying to slow down and not over-schedule. Part of the reason we decided to put a halt to activities is so the kids can enjoy being at home more often, and summertime is a perfect time to start. One problem is that as Bethany and Connor get older, they want to spend a lot of time with their friends. I remember what that was like, so I try to accommodate them as best I can without making life too crazy.
As much as I yearn to see everything, everywhere, all the time, Michigan is truly a lovely state with so much to offer. I loved exploring in the Roger's City area, which I can hardly believe we've never done before. We've only ever been there for a wedding and in the winter for Christmas parties. Soon we'll be going on another Michigan up north vacation, this time with my mom. I'm looking forward to seeing some more of my home state, as un-exotic as that may be.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Occam's Razor
How many times in the past year did I find myself driving around and wondering what I could do to reduce chaotic stress in my life? With four kids, is that even possible? A fleeting thought would run through my mind, one I thought I could not even entertain. What if....oh no, never mind, I could never do that. But it kept resurfacing until finally I decided, to heck with it. We are going to simplify our lives and eliminate all extra-curricular activities for one year. Since I'm the one who does 95% (at least) of the family shuttle service, I made up my mind before I mentioned it to Chris. He was on board immediately. At dinner we told the kids: no more Brownies, no more soccer, no more dance, no new activities. The only thing we are keeping is catechism, which is no big deal since it's walking distance and never requires additional commitments (ie, extra practices, field trips, boat loads of money). They said...okay, whatever. The world did not end. I'm pretty sure they won't be deprived of anything life-shattering. I am so looking forward to a year of no crazy running around after school. If the kids would like to return to an activity each once the year is up, we'll probably let them. The school year is almost over, and we have one lingering soccer picnic, a few dance classes/rehearsals, and two days of dance recitals.Then freeeeeeeeeedom!
The funny thing is, whenever I mention our brilliant plan to anyone, I get a sort of weird reaction. I have the feeling people think I'm nuts for stepping out of the self-imposed junior rat race. Is it really that abnormal to abstain from extracurricular activities at the elementary level, that it renders people silent when I bring it up? I can't quite tell what that's all about. Now that I've embraced the idea, I am envisioning more time at home, and a calmer and less hectic atmosphere. I think I can actually breathe easier. While I do think activities can be great for kids, I also firmly believe our kids will benefit from this experiment.
In other news, Mathilda is a full-fledged walking toddler now. She is so dang cute toddling around the house. Not so cute tearing everything out of any cupboard or drawer she can reach...She has also been saying some "baby" a lot, including "me a baby", "yeah baby", and "not bad baby." "Dance" and "pizza" are a couple other words she has recently added to her vocabulary.
Last week I accompanied Connor on a field trip to Stoney Creek. We had a great time hiking around and having a guided tour of the nature center by an aging wannabe hippie named Mark from the park. He seriously made up crazy weird songs about everything (to the beat of old classic tunes - lots of Beatles) and made the kids sing after him.
Today I went on a field trip with Bethany's class to downtown Detroit. We took a Diamond Jack boat ride on the Detroit River, which was really nice. The weather was just gorgeous. After our ride, we walked along the River Walk to the Ren Cen. The kids got wet in the fountains before we went inside, had a guided tour and took the elevator to the top (72 floors). I told Bethany I thought it was funny that when I was in 3rd grade I also went on a field trip to the Ren Cen and took the elevator to the top. Bethany was invited to a friend's house after school which totally made her day.
Tomorrow is field day at Violet, then the kids have 2 1/2 days next week. We have quite a bit planned for the summer and I am looking forward to getting on with it.
The funny thing is, whenever I mention our brilliant plan to anyone, I get a sort of weird reaction. I have the feeling people think I'm nuts for stepping out of the self-imposed junior rat race. Is it really that abnormal to abstain from extracurricular activities at the elementary level, that it renders people silent when I bring it up? I can't quite tell what that's all about. Now that I've embraced the idea, I am envisioning more time at home, and a calmer and less hectic atmosphere. I think I can actually breathe easier. While I do think activities can be great for kids, I also firmly believe our kids will benefit from this experiment.
In other news, Mathilda is a full-fledged walking toddler now. She is so dang cute toddling around the house. Not so cute tearing everything out of any cupboard or drawer she can reach...She has also been saying some "baby" a lot, including "me a baby", "yeah baby", and "not bad baby." "Dance" and "pizza" are a couple other words she has recently added to her vocabulary.
Last week I accompanied Connor on a field trip to Stoney Creek. We had a great time hiking around and having a guided tour of the nature center by an aging wannabe hippie named Mark from the park. He seriously made up crazy weird songs about everything (to the beat of old classic tunes - lots of Beatles) and made the kids sing after him.
Today I went on a field trip with Bethany's class to downtown Detroit. We took a Diamond Jack boat ride on the Detroit River, which was really nice. The weather was just gorgeous. After our ride, we walked along the River Walk to the Ren Cen. The kids got wet in the fountains before we went inside, had a guided tour and took the elevator to the top (72 floors). I told Bethany I thought it was funny that when I was in 3rd grade I also went on a field trip to the Ren Cen and took the elevator to the top. Bethany was invited to a friend's house after school which totally made her day.
Tomorrow is field day at Violet, then the kids have 2 1/2 days next week. We have quite a bit planned for the summer and I am looking forward to getting on with it.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Mission: Abort?
I hate to admit it, but the 21-day no complaining challenge sort of went out the window. At first, I think I was being too strict regarding what constitutes complaining. Maybe making a valid observation isn't the same as complaining. Also, sometimes complaining is a necessary evil. I need to think a little more about how I want to define complaining for these purposes, and start fresh. In the meantime, I have continued to wear the rubber band around my wrist as a reminder to shut my mouth when I feel the complaints about to escape my lips. The whole mission was not a total bust; I have become more conscious of my negativity, attitude, and crabbiness. Since I didn't start out being a big complainer in the first place, I think it would be more beneficial in my case to strive to be more positive and to not let bad moods transform me into a bitch.
The kids are on Spring Break. I'm so happy to have them home for the next week. I wonder how many times in a week the idea of homeschooling goes through my head. School is great and all, but sometimes I just think it would be awesome to have my kids with me and learning things in a more non-conventional way. I'm not sure I could ever be that organized or patient, but I digress. A few friends and I thought we'd start the break out with a fun day at the zoo yesterday. Unfortunately, the gorgeous weather we've been having gave everyone else the same idea too. When we got off the freeway and started seeing signs about the zoo parking lot being full, we knew we were in trouble. So we met up at a nearby parking lot and ended up deciding not to torture ourselves. We agreed the experience would not be much fun while fighting crowds and trying to keep our large group together. Instead we headed for a park in the area and let the kids run around for a couple hours. It was not the day we had planned, but the kids got to be outside with their friends on an unseasonably warm April afternoon, and I'd call that a lovely day.
My kids are so lucky. That seems to be a recurrent theme in my blogging, but it is just something that has been on my mind lately. My childhood was so quiet and lonesome. I had friends and cousins, and I did get to do a lot of cool stuff, but for the most part I was responsible for entertaining myself. I don't think it is a good idea for parents to constantly entertain their kids, and I don't feel that Chris and I do that, but our kids are fortunate that they have each other, and that I am friends with many of their friends' parents. I know we are building lifelong memories for our kids when we all get together to dye Easter eggs (as we did on Thursday afternoon) or spend the afternoon at a park. They have this group that they spend so much time with, they really have the opportunity to get to know each other and be comfortable with each other. And of course there is the added benefit for me that I have a group of friends to hang out with, and we always have an excuse to get together. I am lucky too!
Connor had his first soccer practice Friday evening. Two girls from his class are on his team, as well as a boy Connor knows from one of the other first grade classes. I like his coach. Connor did pretty well too. I'm happy he decided he wants to play soccer again. We all went to watch him practice. On the way there, Lucy and Mathilda fell asleep in the van holding hands. I wish I had had my camera, it was so darn cute!
Bethany has been wanting to do nothing but somersaults (flips as she says) and cartwheels. Connor has been on a Lego kick. Mathilda has been pulling herself up to stand more and more. She has slept at least part of the night in the crib a few times this week. Tonight she is sleeping in the play pen, but that's okay, I'll take it. If she sleeps at least a few hours without me every night, I am a happy mama. Lucy says the funniest things all the time. The other day we were at Linda's and Linda was giving me some Easter decorations. Lucy was thinking decorations meant Christmas, so she asked me about when Christmas will be here. When I told her not for a long time she said, "wait, I'm so confused!". The funny thing about Lucy is that she says really big words and they are almost always used correctly. She told Linda the other day, while looking at herself in the mirror, that she looked "totally awesome - like a teenager". But I am afraid she has some seasonal allergies, she has been sneezing and blowing her nose like crazy (as well as the other kids, but she seems particularly affected). I hope she feels better to enjoy some Easter treats.
The kids are on Spring Break. I'm so happy to have them home for the next week. I wonder how many times in a week the idea of homeschooling goes through my head. School is great and all, but sometimes I just think it would be awesome to have my kids with me and learning things in a more non-conventional way. I'm not sure I could ever be that organized or patient, but I digress. A few friends and I thought we'd start the break out with a fun day at the zoo yesterday. Unfortunately, the gorgeous weather we've been having gave everyone else the same idea too. When we got off the freeway and started seeing signs about the zoo parking lot being full, we knew we were in trouble. So we met up at a nearby parking lot and ended up deciding not to torture ourselves. We agreed the experience would not be much fun while fighting crowds and trying to keep our large group together. Instead we headed for a park in the area and let the kids run around for a couple hours. It was not the day we had planned, but the kids got to be outside with their friends on an unseasonably warm April afternoon, and I'd call that a lovely day.
My kids are so lucky. That seems to be a recurrent theme in my blogging, but it is just something that has been on my mind lately. My childhood was so quiet and lonesome. I had friends and cousins, and I did get to do a lot of cool stuff, but for the most part I was responsible for entertaining myself. I don't think it is a good idea for parents to constantly entertain their kids, and I don't feel that Chris and I do that, but our kids are fortunate that they have each other, and that I am friends with many of their friends' parents. I know we are building lifelong memories for our kids when we all get together to dye Easter eggs (as we did on Thursday afternoon) or spend the afternoon at a park. They have this group that they spend so much time with, they really have the opportunity to get to know each other and be comfortable with each other. And of course there is the added benefit for me that I have a group of friends to hang out with, and we always have an excuse to get together. I am lucky too!
Connor had his first soccer practice Friday evening. Two girls from his class are on his team, as well as a boy Connor knows from one of the other first grade classes. I like his coach. Connor did pretty well too. I'm happy he decided he wants to play soccer again. We all went to watch him practice. On the way there, Lucy and Mathilda fell asleep in the van holding hands. I wish I had had my camera, it was so darn cute!
Bethany has been wanting to do nothing but somersaults (flips as she says) and cartwheels. Connor has been on a Lego kick. Mathilda has been pulling herself up to stand more and more. She has slept at least part of the night in the crib a few times this week. Tonight she is sleeping in the play pen, but that's okay, I'll take it. If she sleeps at least a few hours without me every night, I am a happy mama. Lucy says the funniest things all the time. The other day we were at Linda's and Linda was giving me some Easter decorations. Lucy was thinking decorations meant Christmas, so she asked me about when Christmas will be here. When I told her not for a long time she said, "wait, I'm so confused!". The funny thing about Lucy is that she says really big words and they are almost always used correctly. She told Linda the other day, while looking at herself in the mirror, that she looked "totally awesome - like a teenager". But I am afraid she has some seasonal allergies, she has been sneezing and blowing her nose like crazy (as well as the other kids, but she seems particularly affected). I hope she feels better to enjoy some Easter treats.
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