Saturday, September 17, 2011

Your Bottom is Safe in This House (Unless It's Your Birthday)

My kids have never been spanked, not one of them, not once, not ever. Before any of them arrived Chris and I decided we would raise our kids without spankings. Or smacking, or washing mouths out with soap, or other pain or humiliation invoking punishments. As parents, I'd say we've often found ourselves doing things we never thought we'd do, but this one is important to us and we've stuck with it.

I am fully aware that a lot of people don't agree with our choice. In fact, I'm not sure I personally know anyone who does. In all honesty, I have to admit there have been times when I have been SO tempted to give one of them a spanking they would not soon forget. But it is always when I am so mad I can't see straight. When I'm thinking clearly I have never thought hurting or humiliating my children would be the best way to discipline them. 

I know a lot of people think that kids who aren't spanked are spoiled brats who have the run of the house and are allowed to get away with anything. If you know me and my kids in person, maybe you think this about them and have never told me, but I doubt it. They're not perfect, yet we have high expectations for them. They are fully expected to be well-mannered, respectful, and kind. Sometimes they need reminders, but I think they're pretty darn good kids. Am I biased? I hope so. I'm their mother, I should be. They need someone to be biased in their favor. But I'm not blind. They get in trouble. Now and then they get yelled at, if they really tick us off. They get privileges taken away and they get long, boring lectures which they'd probably do just about anything to avoid. 

The truth is, I feel guilty enough when I lose my temper and yell. I feel like the worst mother ever. Maybe there are some days when my my kids would agree with that sentiment. But I don't ever regret the decision not to spank, and I'm so very thankful that Chris is with me 100 percent. 


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